The only reason I am posting this photo is because the girl's back is to the camera. I was stopping in a CVS to buy some furniture polish and Windex. A 13 year old girl was caught/accused of stealing $129 worth of merchandise. The cops kept asking her "why are you stealing".
This a little blurry because I took the photo as inconspicuously as possible.
I don't watch much television and loathe reality television, so why did this capture my attention? Why did I know who Jennifer Lyons was?
Because she was diagnosed with stage III breast cancer in 2005. I found her on a Google search because In 2007, I was clinically diagnosed with stage IIIA breast cancer. I looked at her survival as a source of hope.
But she died today.
This news is a jolt from my office chair. Something I don't need to be reading while taking a quick break from a stressful job. So many thoughts are running through my head.. when did she have a recurrence? 2005 was five years ago. I've survived over two years, what does that mean? Maybe her disease was more advanced than mine. I was IIIA, maybe she was IIIB or IIIC?
But then again, I know people who were diagnosed at Stage I just a few years ago who are now dead.
Here's a scary little snippet I found on the 'net. Granted it's from a text book at least ten years old:
Palliative Treatment ( Advanced Disease ) - Stage III breast cancer may be treated either with : a) systemic therapy ( either hormonal or chemotherapy ) to determine the effectiveness of the systemic treatment and to reduce the bulk of tumor; b) with local therapy, which may be either mastectomy followed by radiation therapy or radiation therapy alone. The median length of survival after effective treatment is 18 to 24 months.
Guess I'm living on borrowed time.
It's important to describe the clinically part. A little known fact about breast tumors - doctors do not know the size of a tumor until it is surgically removed. In other words - tumors can be smaller or bigger than they appear on a scan. Additionally when tumors are aggravated by, say - someone drills into your chest or smashes your breast between two pieces of plexi-glass until you scream for mercy - they tend to create a wall of scar tissue which can also make a tumor appear larger on scans. Now when I was diagnosed I got the express treatment and I had all these tests done within a few days. My stage III diagnosis was determined by the size of the tumor which could very easily have been more scar tissue than tumor.
Also - I had neoadjuvant therapy which means they did chemo first than the surgery. They chemo was supposed to just shrink the tumor - but instead the chemo obliterated it. As a matter of fact - I had a normal MRI between my 7th & 8th chemo treatment. So I never got an accurate measurement of my tumor. As for lymph nodes - I just had one (that they could confirm).
So in short - I may have actually been Stage IIB which has a much better prognosis. And the longer I go without evidence of a recurrence the better my odds of celebrating my 50th birthday.
Today I went to B&H on 9th street to look at the Nikon D90 camera. I'm due for an upgrade. I decided to wait a bit before I purchased it. Now I'm having second thoughts. Perhaps I should buy it now.
There has been one big change since I left Kensington. The G train now goes to Church Avenue. For my commute this works out pretty well, because I can still transfer to the A from the G but for others I'm not so sure. Seems like the G train clogs up the station and slows down F service. I've especially noticed this going into Church from Manhattan. Reason? G train service starts and ends on Church and they use the local track. Now why not use the express track? That way the G train won't disrupt the already slow F service.
Back in March, many NYC bloggers (including myself) mourned the sudden death of Robert Guskind of Gowanus Lounge and since that sad day the Gowanus Lounge website had remained silent, inactive.
Robert was very kind to me. He frequently featured my photos and sometimes even linked back to this site.
However a few weeks ago and with a lurch in my stomach, I noticed new posts on my Google Reader. It seems that Guskind's wife sold the Gowanus Lounge domain. This new version launched with a similar mission to Guskind's vision:
Gowanus Lounge is an informal review of News, Business, and Life in New
York as well as in the US as a whole. Expect to find our rants about
Real Estate, the economy, Religion, and even pictures of life
throughout this great land. We’ll review hotels and restaurants that we
want you to know about – basically everything is open and you’ll see
this website take shape as time goes on!
Not sure if there focus is going to be on Brooklyn or not. It is clearly missing Guskind's heart and soul which is what makes a blog interesting in my opinion. Are they really passionate about their topics or are they hoping to bank on the recycled domain? We shall see. There is a very interesting post on the Brighton Beach Baths. This post was deleted ...for some reason.
And speaking of heart and soul I recently discovered some very good blogs written by those that are passionate about their topics.
The first is F.I.P.S or (F***** in Park Slope). This blog totally rants and raves about Park Slope life from complaining about stroller nazi's (they are called breeders) to reporting about movie stars volunteering at the food co-cop. It may have splattering of anger. But really, what's wrong with that? Rock on F.I.P.S.
The second one is really my most favorite blog right now: Kensington Stories. Unlike the now dead in the water Kensington Blog (which I feel was originally more focused on gentrifying Kensington as quickly as possible) this blog really has a lot of warmth and is written by Ron Lopez a Kensington native. A tour through this blog will pull you into Church Avenue circa 1970. I love this blog!!
While on vacation I was sorting through some old(er) photos to put up and I came across this photo of a tossed out couch...A Gowanus Lounge/Robert Guskind specialty. Here's to you Robert...
In an effort to avoid remaining static.. I want to start listing what I accomplished in each year. I was partially inspired by Dooce year in photos.. here goes..
So my next injection is supposed to be at the end of this week, either 12/31/09 or 1/1/10. I get a phone call from "Lorraine" to remind me of this. I can tell she is reading from a phone script when she calls me. I tell her "Hey - so glad you called, I was just about to email and set up a time." turns out "Lorraine" can't set up the appointment for me, nor can she transfer me to the person who can.
So I tell her I'll email the research assistant. When I check the last email I got from her, there is a telephone number for my oncs assistant. When I call the number - I get a recording telling me not to leave a message at this number because it won't be retrieved.
So I call the research assistant who can't set the appointment up for me either. I tell her "Look, I'm available whenever all I need is someone to tell me where and when, and I'll be there."
This ineptitude makes me wonder a) did I ever have cancer in the first place and b) is this a sign that maybe I should stop the protocol.
Well I finally finished that scarf. I have been working on this scarf for nearly a year. There was some speed bumps on the way, I had to unravel it and do it over, and I set it aside in the summer. This pattern needed a lot of attention. The trinity stitch is very unforgiving. It's not perfect, but I'm very happy with it.
I even knitted a hat (in the trinity stitch) to match.
I'm ready to start another project, so I walked over to a yarn store I used to go to on Coney Island Avenue. The store was having a "going out of business sale". I bought three skeins of gray yarn, and some black and red yarn. I plan to make some scarves for some friends. (I'm ready for some simple projects) While I'm happy about the sale, I'm sad that this store is going out of business. Yarn stores are harder and harder to come by. I'm not a big fan of buying my yarn on-line. I like to hold the merchandise before I buy.
It's not too often that the two of them sit this close together. Zelda (the smaller one) absolutely ADORES Ophelia. Looks up to her like a big sister. Ophelia on the other hand wants little to do with her. Zelda's favorite trick is to sit on top of Ophelia's head and give her a little bath. Ophelia tolerates this.
While Zelda is content to sit next to me and hang out, she doesn't let me touch her much. She hates to be held and has just started to let me pet her.
I'm laying low this holiday season. I have twelve days off. I can't remember the last time I had that many days off in a row. I plan to finally read The Rise and Fall of the Third Reich. I have been wanting to read that book for years. But at nearly 1,500 pages, it's a brick and hard to carry in my book bag. I keep putting it to the side in favor of smaller books so I've never been able to finish it. Also I'm hesitant to read a book with a swastika on the cover on while riding the subway in Brooklyn.
So today I spent a good deal of time reading - and later made myself a refreshing green juice with some vegetables I had in the fridge:
Chard Celery Cucumber Cilantro Parsley Ginger 2 Green Apples (for sweetness) Lemon (with a 1/4 of the rind left on)
I'm on page 189. I'm determined to finish this book before the end of the year.
When I moved back to this neighborhood a few months ago I was thrilled that FINALLY FreshDirect was delivering to my area. I had always wanted to use this service. I never have a enough groceries in the house because schleping heavy groceries can be quite the headache.
So the day I moved back I placed my first order. I have to say I was impressed . The food was packed well, and the eggs were not broken. They sell my favorite yogurt by the case, and they ain't kidding when they say "fresh".
However, there is one very big problem. Delivery times. I can never get a delivery time that was convenient for me. They fill up so quickly - I would have to shop days - sometimes a week in advance. On top of that - they close not just on holidays (which does make perfect sense) but on the day after as well. This morning I tried to place a grocery order and I can't get a delivery until Sunday night. But even when there is not a holiday, I often have to wait three days for my grocery order and the delivery slot I can get is often at 10pm.
Before I couldn't get delivery because they wouldn't come to my area, now that they come to my area I can't get a delivery because their service is so high in demand there are no time slots available. It just seems like a very poor business model to routinely turn away business.
Since they obviously have enough customers, I guess they won't be needing my business anymore.
I was shooting on Ocean Parkway and these guys actually WANTED me to take their photo. That's a switch. I would love to take more photos of people on Ocean Parkway but they are just so darn paranoid.
I didn't go to Mexico to get dental work. I only considered it after I had booked the vacation. A few years back I had read a news article somewhere about people going to Mexico to get dental work done, I did some research and found this site .. which led me to Dental Maya. I contacted the webmaster and before I knew it had an appointment booked for the day after my arrival. Camila e-mailed me with a price list, and called me to confirm my appointment and even arranged a taxi to pick me up at my hotel. Porcelain crowns started at about $290.
Now I was very hesitant about all this. For one thing I didn't want to spend my vacation doing dental work. For another I was concerned about infection, but not as much. But I had a temporary filling in my mouth - which I should have had for
only a few weeks at most - for a year and half. I was on borrowed
time, and I knew that one day that filling was going to fall out and I would once again have a dental emergency and be at the mercy of whatever dentist would take the appointment. I figured, I'm here, the price is right, let's get this taken care of.
So I went.
The car picked me up at 10 am on Saturday and I got a little tour of downtown Cancun. When I got to the office, they took me right upstairs. It looked like any dental office I would have gone to in Brooklyn or Queens. There were some families with children waiting to get their teeth cleaned. I spoke briefly with Dr. German who told me that I had some other cavities to fill, but for the crown, he could fit me with a porcelain one. He gave me three prices, between $280 - $800. "But I don't recommend you pay $800" he told me. $400 should be sufficient. "
While they were working on me, they made sure I saw that all the equipment and tools were sterilized and sealed. It made me giggle.. I was fitted with a new temporary filling, and cane back four days later for the crown.
The total cost: $467.00. (this included the x-ray.) And so far, I've had no problems at all.
About a year and a half ago, right after I started a new job - one of my molars crumbled into dust. This happened on a Friday, right before labor day weekend, and just a few hours before the dental insurance from my previous job was going to expire. I had decided not to COBRA my dental plan. (This was partially due to the $593 a month cost I had to pay for medical insurance alone. Which I had to pay for two months.)
Since It was going to be another two months before I would be eligible for dental insurance at my current job, and walking around with half a tooth was not an option (not to mention excruciatingly painful) I opted to go into a dental office in Brighton Beach, Brooklyn to get an emergency root canal.
Because I had no insurance I had to settle for a temporary filling, and decided to wait for the crown work until I had insurance to cover at least part of it. When the insurance kicked in, I started to shop around for a crown. Of course, I wanted a porcelain crown and since it was a molar it was going to need to be a strong crown. I could get a metal one for $500 but that wouldn't do. I called a dentist in Manhattan to get a price on the porcelain crown and nearly dropped the phone when I heard the cost ..
They start at $1,500 - and go up from there......
What the &#^@!!!?
I literally hung up on them..
Now let me quickly explain something about dental insurance. (In case you don't know). Dental insurance only covers a percentage of what THEY PERCEIVE to be a reasonable cost for the service you would be getting. What most people don't know is there is a HUGE GAP between what insurance companies believe are reasonable and what the dentist charges. And remember dental insurance only pays a PERCENTAGE of that small cost. So say for example you have coverage for 50% for crowns. And that crown is $1,500, but your insurance company says it should only cost $400. That means, your insurance will only pay $200 for the crown and the rest has to be paid out of pocket.. PLUS insurance usually won't cover side-line costs related to the work like additional x-rays..etc. PLUS you usually have to pay the charges up front...and hope the insurance reimburses you. (good luck with that).
Either way I was looking at putting down a huge chunk of change.
So when I booked my trip to Mexico (which as I write this sound really frivolous considering I have teeth rotting in my mouth) I decided to do what many Americans and Canadians have done. I decided to look into getting the work done in Mexico..
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